Fruit Flies and Chicken Thighs

 
This time of year, fruit flies come a callin’ and fruit bowls across the country play host to these uninvited guests.

Where do they come from? These little PITAS have a nose for produce and can smell a ripe piece of fruit (or a glass of Pinot Grigio) from miles away. And, since these winged home invaders are so tiny they can easily find their way into our homes.

They may also hitch a ride home on the fruits or vegetables we buy at the grocery store via eggs laid on the skin of ripe or fermenting fruit. Creeeeeeeepy.

Fruit flies can develop from egg to adult in just 8 days. Kids—they just grow up so fast these days. And they are persistent little buggers. Even if you get rid of the produce on your counter, it may not help. They don’t actually need fruit to keep reproducing. They can breed in other mmmmoist surfaces like inside your plumbing, or on an old sponge or dish cloth.

Well, that makes a lot of sense then. We put all our fruit away in the fridge. Including the bananas. The only thing I despise more than a banana, is a cold banana. I know—who hates bananas? Me. 

Even after a week in a fruit free zone, the flies are still around! I suspect they’ve formed a colony in the kitchen sink drain pipes. Apparently I need to pour boiling water or vinegar down there to murder them.

If you cruise Pinterest you’ll find loads ways to construct your own fly traps. I’ve used dish soap and vinegar in the past. It works fairly well, but it looks vile. I really don’t want a bowl of drowning bugs on my counter top thank you. Plus, the vinegar smell makes me gag.

I used one of these traps for the past few years. It worked pretty well but the flies just aren’t falling for it anymore. Now they just land on it and laugh. 

 

I just looked more carefully at this photo (taken last year when the flies still feel for it and I noticed some maggoty fly larvae. Gah.ross. 

My friend was over the other day and saw my fruit fly situation. She told me she sucks them up in the vacuum. Brilliant. So this is what we do for sport now. We lure them into the kitchen with a nearly empty Corona bottle with lime and when then hover around it, we suck them into the upside down (Yes, that’s a Stranger Things reference.). It’s not a permanent solution, but it’s satisfying. 

As annoying as they are, at least they’re not Pantry Moths. Have you ever heard of these? I hadn’t until a few years ago. I noticed these small grey moths (which are basically tiny bats) in our dry goods cupboard. Upon further inspection I discovered larvae in the rice and pretty everything in that cupboard. Disgusting. We think they came in on some dried apricots from a bulk food store. We managed to get rid of them pretty quickly but not without some serious gagging. My daughter mistakenly called them, “Panty Moths” which… let me tell, resulted in great hilarity—mostly at my expense.

Like, Where did those Panty Moths come from? Lisa’s granny panties! Har har. 

Know what other bugs bug me? Ants. We must have an ant hive under our front entry way, because there’s an army of them marching all over my front porch.

As much as I despise fruit flies and ants and all breeds of moths, wasps are worse. The absolute worst. I wrote a post about those idiots here: Honk If You’re Hornet: A Rant about Wasps


What do chicken thighs have to do with this post? Absolutely nothing. I just liked the way it sounded in the title. SEO? What SEO?